Normal. I’ve been thinking a lot about this word this week and what it can mean to us. It’s definition is ‘usual, expected or standard.’
When we’re chasing goals and wanting more ‘normal’ doesn’t really feel very exciting or fulfilling but normal is often when we get to breathe out, to rest and just be.
Normal can be a major achievement too. I still need 3 monthly reviews and blood tests as I’m less than 2 years post stem cell transplant. I saw my consultant yesterday and all my test results are still normal.
I wouldn’t want to be anything else.
I read this quote a week ago and its really stuck with me and made me think. I’ve re-written this post a few times as I’ve tried to work out what I want to say. I think that’s because I want to love people without conditions but once you’ve been hurt a few times it gets a bit harder.
Life can be tough and people don’t always behave towards us in a way we would like. We can feel as though we need to build a defensive shell around ourselves. It can feel like the sensible thing to do is to be more wary of the next person, the next situation and to not love as abundantly, to give of ourselves so freely.
I know though, that what happens when we do that, is that we become a shadow of who we would like to be because we’ve been shaped more by people’s reactions and behaviours than by who we are on the inside; who we were created to be.
The good news is we can choose to change. We can stop to listen to who we really are and we can choose to live that out. We can choose to live a life defined by who we want to be and not by other people’s opinions or responses. It takes bravery and courage to live a life that’s true to ourselves but it’s so worth it.
Let me know if I can help.